“could we—err…”
drao studied him losely. he seemed inredibly nervous all of a sudden. what was going on?
“bsp;we, um, turs?” potter asked.
“you want to do it in the dark?” drao oked his head to the side, his mind raing. why would potter want to turs? oh, merlirying to be hivalrous again, waser, i may be a virgin, but i’m not some damsel in distress. i ahis.”
“it’s not about—” potter bit his lip. “err, okay…then, maybe, err, we ould keep our lothes on?”
“that…would ompliate things,” dra to push down the disappoi that was quikly bubbling up inside him. “i thought you wao fuk me. i meaill holding my ok.”
“i do,” potter mumbled. to drao’s horror, he slowly let go of his ok. “but…um… okay, maybe…we ould at least keep our shirts on?”
drao was he thought he saw potter’s eyes fliker down to drao’s hands. or was it…his arms?
oh.
“you don’t wa,” he whispered, uanding hitting him like a sp aross the fae. “you don’t wahe dark mark.”
potter frowaken abak. seriously? was he really trying to feign ignorane now?
drao stared at him while his ied to tighten painfully. it felt like he was free-falling into a bk hole, whih was suking all traes of happi of him, leaviy and old.
“you don’t wahed, flinhiab he felt to his hest.
“otter looked inredulous. but drao wouldn’t be fooled by him anymore.
“you think i’m disgusting!” he pushed potter aped up his trousers. “you just wanted a quik one-off. of ourse! i’m not good en else!”
it hurt so muh, voiing one of his biggest fears. how iroer had turgart. how ould drao have been so stupid? of ourse potter did him.
“drao, that’s not—this has nothing to do with your dark mark.”
“what other reasoell me this isn’t beause of who i am!”
“it’s not—”
“no, that’s exatly it! you an’t go around, fuking random people beause you’re harry potter. so you lured me in with your i at. are you really that desperate? you really hat badly, you’d do it with someone who disgusts you?”
“you don’t disgust me,” potter said, his v.
“you dido look at me! you turned me around so you wouldo see my fae! that’s how disgusted you are by me! whoing to piture while you fuked me, huh? wood? weasley?”
“fuk you, drao!” potter bellowed.
“you know what, you’re the disgustier! you disgust me!”
holy, drao didn’t know eted after that, but rab his suit jaket and storm out of his room hurt almost as muh as beihe dark lord.
uo hold himself up any loo his knees. he id. of ourse potter didn’t want him. nobody waill, he had thought potter was differehought pht…might…
“stupid,” he hissed at himself. “so, so stupid!”
that would teah him. he should have ko let someo himself be fooled like that. holy, potter was he rest of the bl world. if anything, he was worse. he was a fuking hyporite.
maybe drao should have stuk to his dreams. yes, they ouldh reality, but reality had the ruel teo hoke off any kind of hope, even for someone who usually dido hope at all.
thursday, 5 june 2003
“are you goi oing to stare at it until your eyeballs fall out of your head?”
“shut up, pansy.”
“the only reason i’m not gue with you is beause it’s your birthday. otherwise i’d be telling you rik you are.”
“i know it’s from him. i’m not goi.”
& bak.”
“it’s not that easy.”
“of ourse it is.” pansy leaned f the hampage in her hand. “ooooh, you want to know what’s i you?”
“it’s just a letter,” drao snapped.
“you wao read it?” pansy smirked.